The way of the Bull

I saw a picture of him, and it hit me in the gut-- and then quickly flooded the weight of everything he still occupied in to beating life, out from under my ribs.

The light of a Head strong, heart felt Taurus…with a Bull-minded, ball Busting, bulls eye…arrow shot, straight through my soul.
I was ascending stairs at an Irish bar ( it is always an Irish bar…my life happens in
)
…I remember what I was wearing for a shirt, and what he was wearing on his face…the second our eyes met
“ I see you”
We said.
With out a word…
But his jaw was agape…
either due to being in the midst of savoring the beer he was drinking, or deciding me to be a delicious catch…which also…was still ultimately due…to the beer….I would assume as, Beer always makes me look better 

The admiration he gained from me was won, all in the space of a song…
By Rod Stewart..
(What makes this story all the more entertaining…is that just this Summer past…I actually met Rod Stewart at a swank-shit-bag club in L.A.…He was hammered on a table celebrating his son’s birthday…singing out loud
The same words
“ You lost that loving feeling”…that got me the first time….
and it all came rushing back….and then out…
I had too much tequila that night to try and temper the environment I was submerged in…
So between a stroll down memory lane, prancing with too much patron…I ended up retching that night up, in to the toilette…I didn’t particularly care for any aspect of that club scene….except for Rod Stewart…and the song…he was singing…
That sounded a smile and tears as quick as taking my first shot of tequila mixed in the memory of my first true love.

No questions asked…He was the first love of my life…and will for ever, occupy a room in my heart…where nothing more then the echo of him, and of course….. a beer pong table…. can fit.


I learned something about life…. to quell a heart break, by building more room for my whole heart to ache…is the key growing….
I have realized The feeling of true love will for ever keep the shape of the man it belonged to in my soul… For my heart today, is the sum of all it has sunk through…to rise through the tides of tears that had come when I realized, my hands were no longer holding the other person…I felt I belonged to…
And in this way….
As much as it hurts…you find a way to be born a new day, belonging better to yourself….This is the beauty of pain, struck in to you to become a stronger smile.
This is the beauty that to this day, will strike senseless for at least a second…when truly I sit in the center of first man I loved, from the middle of my heart.
Where all else…became my garden, bittersweet.